ThePullenCount.com

New The Apprentice drinking game: Take a drink every time someone: Incorrectly uses a reflexive pronoun: "That was myself, Lord Sugar" Says: "Price point". Says: "Thrown under the bus". Every time Lord Sugar is called away on "Urgent Business". Every time someone "Smashes it out (of) the park" 

Tommy Two-names acolyte Daniel Thomas (Danny Tommo) has publicly commented on the end of his bromance with the activist, sex doll rental pioneer, and co-founder of the OTRC "unity"  group Ryan Bridge, following a travel ban issued by the French Interior Ministry. Tommo, who described Bridge's post-break up comments as "sinister" announced the next stage of his campaign to save Britain: invading Dover on January 24th with his hastily assembled crew of football enthusiasts. Their Operation Overlord 2 c̶a̶s̶h̶ ̶c̶o̶w̶ campaign saw the dastardly duo taking selfies, dressed in matching Barbour (cute!) with damaged dinghies on French beaches, using some of the £100k (before tax) provided by supporters. The travel ban adds another country in which Bridge won't be able to holibob this year: The Spanish authorities have a few questions to ask regarding his involvement in a multi -million pound holiday insurance scheme. I can't help but think: if one...

The callow youth reading an article in Smash Hits about a Birmingham band called Fuzzbox would never have believed that I would know Tina socially all these years later.  Mad love for these pioneering, proto-Riot Grrrl Indie popstrels. 

Day 5 of the bird feeding programme: The Cath Kidston bird feeder lies broken, like an Erdington pub's toilet door. The fat balls have been claimed by the squirrels. The Magpies run amok, claiming the territory as their own, subjugating the wood pigeons.  An opportunistic Robin swoops down regularly, leaving chaos in its wake. I'm locked in a battle of wills with nature.  There can be only one victor. 

You know what they say: Out with the old (dishbrush), in with the new (dishbrush). Old Faithful has served me well this year: I'll forever hold dear the memory of how we tackled the great burnt-on pasta fiasco together, back in July. Good times. They become like part of the family don't they?  Still, it's time to cross the Rainbow Bridge to the Great Washing Up Bowl In The Sky. Rest In Fairy Max Power, steadfast old chum.  I shall never forget you.